I'm sorry to scream at you via the title of this entry, but I feel as if I need to shout it out to the world....I'M FREE!!!!
I received an unofficial confirmation from the union hall yesterday that I was approved for the buyout package, but management informed me at 6:39 this morning that I am, for real, a free girl! That's right folks, not only is today my last day at work after 9 long and grueling years, but I get to leave with enough money to fund the opening of my new little shop.
You will no longer have to read through my dry and bitchy entries where I wonder about all the little "what if's" because all of that weight and stress and anxiety I've been feeling is gone. I'm having a hard time wrapping my mind around the concept that this is it. This is the last day I'll sit at this desk and see these same people every day. I won't have to get up and rush through the normal morning shit/shower/shave routine I've come to know and accept. No more paying $135/month just to park to come to work. No more jumping off the internet when my boss walks by because I don't want to get caught. No more corporate Verizon bullshit. No more. I'm free.
I expected to leave this place despising it still, but the truth is, I don't. I planned on ripping someone a new a-hole in my exit interview, and maybe even going further than that, in order to find some sort of redemption for how I've felt throughout all these years. But I won't. I'm not angry. I'm not looking for revenge. If anything I'm actually grateful for this because if I hadn't spent all those years here, I couldn't afford to just up and leave and open my own shop. The money I've received from my time spent here will pay for that and then some.
Now I can focus all of my energy on the beginnings of my little business. I'm my own boss. In preparation for my grand opening, I plan on getting up early each morning every day (starting Monday...a girl's gotta celebrate, you know). I'll get up at 6:00, turn on Howard Stern and sew my little fingers off until the show is over. I need to stay productive, although, I'd be lying if I said I'm not excited to catch up on the gazillion movies I have saved on the DVR, and the Netflix DVDs I've had for several months now, and the stack of books I've been dying to dive into. I just can't wait to relax, do what I want, and hopefully come to love life. Our trip to Florida in a few weeks won't hurt things either.
I know there are a lot of close friends and family who read this blog, and I just want to thank each and every one of you for all of your support and love and encouragement in every stage of my struggle (I feel lame calling it a struggle, but that's what it felt like). You've all helped me out so much and I really couldn't have made it through this without you. I'm sorry for ending this post with such a sappy "I love you, man" conclusion, but I'm happy and I was starting to forget how that felt. So I'll just simply say...thanks.